I’m afraid to leave New York.
I’m afraid it will be too good some where else but I’ll always be a little bored
I’m afraid I will lose touch with the beat and the culture, afraid I will age.
I’m afraid that if I leave New York I will never come back
That I’ll never be able to come back
It feels like I’m on a sinking ship
and if I give up this piece of real estate wreckage that I’m clinging too
I’ll never find another that could support my weight
I’m to heavy now for this city
To loaded down with debt
too many emotions
too many streets are haunted now
ghosts of my past
of people and things that didn’t last
Maybe I could be happy some where else?
But what if somewhere else is full of the same kind of people I hate?
Only there’s less of them
And no Central Park in all seasons
No stage managing the Bowery
No snowed in mornings in the Met
New York is like an abusive boyfriend
He beats me but I just can’t seem to leave
He always gives me the sweetest kisses
And the harshest blows.
That’s Saul Williams amazing voice you’re hearing. I know who I’m voting for, I hope the candidate you choose will be a vote for all of us as well. In this system our candidates are supposed to be our voices so help us all be heard. Too many have been silent for so long and we can not go forward that way.
I picked up Staying Fat for Sarah Byrnes by Chris Cruther somewhere in college when I went on one of my “wild amazon” trips and spent like 60 dollars on books in one go! Exciting! The point of these trips was always to buy something I wouldn’t normally buy. I’d read on some blog that Crutcher was this YA must read and I won’t lie the title stuck out at me.
Patrick Ness has written the perfect response to every teen paranormal trilogy out there. The elevator pitch of this book is that it is about the regular kids living in the town where all the paranormal YA prophecy chosen one shit goes down. It’s about not being special and being awesome anyway. I wish I’d had this book in high school. I’m really glad I have this book now.
Last year just before Halloween I got to devour Broken Monsters which was nothing short of stunning. The way she treated Detroit like a haunted house, a ruin of a town like the ruin of bodies the serial killer left standing in for something greater and more grisly. If you haven’t read it yet you need to. From that preamble I assume you can tell I was excited to pick up The Shining Girls.
The Shining Girls is about a time traveling serial killer but it’s mostly about vulnerable women. The girls on the edge, who seemingly put themselves in harms way because most people don’t realize that to be female is to constantly be in harms way. All of the “victims” in Beukes book are women pushing social norms, whither that means being an abortionist or a social worker, a scientist or a showgirl. The sad thing is that as I was reading I didn’t notice that motif, I just saw the type of women killed everyday because women are killed everyday. Sometimes for something as small as ignoring a cat call. Beukes intentionally wanted call attention to issues of violence against women, partially because, like most people, she knew a victim of domestic violence.
I spent a lot of the past few years seeking the faith in physics and the science in religious text. Maybe it’s the whole aging thing. Maybe it’s just the fact that I don’t have kids so most of my thoughts are free to focus on not having to keep a tiny ostensibly drunk human alive. It can get pretty cosmic when you’re bored. Anyway reading the Tao of Physics last year led me here to one of the oldest Hindu Scriptures.